This inner slide of me where i hope to be rationale through literature. Writing out my feels and rationalize the thoughts out, end of the day, giving myself a reason why I should not be upset and why I should feel blessed. True story based on my life.
Thursday, 27 December 2012
Sick weekend before Xmas
Monday: Joan was sick with sneezes
Wednesday: I was having real bad sore throat, and slight runny nose, chills
Thursday: Sore throat with runny nose and a couple of coughs, chills
Friday: Runny Nose, slight sore throat, chills, coughs
Sat: Runny Nose, Cough, No more sore throat - went to see Doc Tan - Had meddy, concussed from 12plus till 7.30pm! Had porridge for Dinner. Hubby cooked! Slept early.
Sunday: Slightly better, still lim beh... but much better than Saturday.
Monday: Coughs. Went facial at new york. At night go gai gai at MBS lo!
Tuesday: Recovering! :D
So basically from start to end, it takes one week. This time round, I spreaded the flu to Manfred. So guilty. He started to have a runny nose with free flow mucus on Friday, then he had really stuck nose during the night. Went to see Doc at SSBC @ AMK with Dr Goh Siok Ying. Had his nose washed and he was crying for life. Poor boy. And he had flu meddy and phlegm meddy.
That Friday night/Sat morning, was my first time I sucked out his mucus using my mouth. :) Disgusting I know. But that was the first time i saw my darling cried so hard due to discomfort. My heart totally lost and broken.
SO, next time u can call me selfish, BUT I M SO GONNA WEAR MASKS WHEN ANYONE FALL SICK AT WORK OR HOME.
Thursday, 22 November 2012
Will you?
Will u still kiss me good morning
Will u still kiss me good night
Will u still be there when Manfred grows up
Will u still remember the me u first met
Will u still be mesmerized by our teenage puppy love
Will u still remember the first song u sang me
Will u still remember our cheesy slogan since 2001?
Thou sun and moon may pass away... Will IT still stay?
Wednesday, 21 November 2012
Keep your eyes away from his
Through out the dinner Manfred was very jovial and kept giggling every time I turned to look at him. So mad cuteness!
When the Indian family was leaving, the mummy came to us and told us Manfred is a doll, and asked us to keep our eyes off his (he has electrifying eyes)
:) happy. And what a nice lady to actually came over and sent us compliments. :)
Good deed, good day!
On a side note, keke, after much pestering I've gotten a belated anniversary present from Big Darling. Kate Spade Stevie baby bag @ $320. It's a love at first sight when I first saw at suntec. Since we din celebrate our anniversary this year so he just got his to compensate for everything lor.
Monday, 19 November 2012
Manfred down with flu
Last night had put 4ml of of fei zai water into his night feed and it really helps! He slept all the way to 4am cried for a diaper change, cried at 6am for morning feed.
Anyway he had shaved botak on 17.11.12 and I really missed his astro boy hairstyle. :(
Hope darling get well soon.
Sunday, 4 November 2012
情势未了 - Unfinished Matters
Friday, 2 November 2012
If one day, robots could replace human AEs... then what could I be?
Well, thou Im always cursing and swearing, but I love my job. I mean if there comes a day that I dont even feel like swearing anymore, it also means I have lost the passion for my job.
Its the nature of the job I enjoy - in the illusionized world of design. No right or wrong, you just have to sell it like a masterpiece. Servicing clients, especially difficult ones has its combo challenges. And because we are not selling products, but designs, which is very subjective, it takes a little more than "that" to SELL. How do you convince your clients that it's WHITE when it's actually BLACK... Or that it's a chicken, when it's actually a duck... Ahhh, that's our job... :) Not saying that we always "Smoke"our clients, but most of the times we have to draw an illusion for them to nod their head and smile silly.. and eventually sign the contract. But first of all, we have to LOVE what we are selling to the clients lar. It's business 道德。
Sometimes the hubby farking hate it when I swear and scold THE "F" word... or some other Hokkien vulgarities when I share with him stories at work. BUT, its difficult not to swear when u meet people who have no common sense, or unreasonable, or vent anger on you when they are not in their best mood, or think they are big fark when they pay peanuts... It's very frustrating! Please, someone introduce me an AE who doesn't swear... I would like to meet The SAINT.
Apart from "those clients' problems", of coz there are a lot of internal problems. When we are over-busy and bring in too much "business", designers have too much on their plates, and they "black face" us lor. But when we don't bring in as much as we could, I WILL GET CALLED INTO THE ROOM and kenna questioned. :( ME! Not the team. Very sians one lar.
But, overall, Im really glad that I still have a very positive team, as in my AEs. Of coz we grumble (ALOT) when we kenna
I
Coming back to the title, hmm... i dont think i will be going back to marketing. This is the career where I will stay. unless... I dunno, maybe some really good offers approach me. :) But, I dont think so.
OR, i will just be a SAHM for Manfred. :) But, but, I always believe WOMAN MUST BE FINANCIALLY INDEPENDENT, no matter how much you earn, 少有少赚,多有多赚。Can never rely on your man for $$$. They will treat you like dust when years go by, and then you become this "yellow face woman". Yes, you can request for
Ah, and the email comes in.. gotta go back to work. BA! (blog again)
Thursday, 25 October 2012
and it's gonna be a loong weekend.
Shiok!
Gotta spend more time with small darling. Suddenly I've got this crazy craving to get preggy again. Dunno why. Kinda miss bring preggy. I know it's quite... DAFUQ. Maybe more maternal hormone hit me. I mean like after seeing Manfred, so cute.. I want more.
But I think big darling got phobia. All the shag nights, feeding and calming the cranky small darling sometimes.
Now at 3 mth plus, small darling is learning how to smile and laugh. He loves to laugh at daddy. Dun ask me Why. He looks funny or wad. Sometimes when I was trying to scold him, like not drinking milk or some notti acts, he smiles at me. How to scold him, u tell me...
I love him.
Friday, 3 August 2012
Manfred's Birth Story.
Sunday, 8 July 2012
Manfred boy, when r u coming out?
last week u weighed 3.3kg and mummy is v proud of u. 3.3kg is a nice weight, u can come out anytime le la. Mummy is starting her Maternity leave tmr. :) Waiting for ur arrival.
Din feel much movement from u today. Lazy le har??
Move it. MOVE IT. BABY.
Monday, 2 July 2012
Thursday, 28 June 2012
Losing a Friend.
To me, a friend who used to be a Dear to me, and suddenly just lost it like that, is a heart break to me. It's almost like a break up, and could take months/years to heal. I know, I don't look like someone who cares about losing a friend. But the inner side of me, is actually a very attached person. Once I like a person, it takes time to "unlike" and forget. Surface is what you see, but you don't judge me by my hard cover.
It's true that it's not a matter how long you know the person, or how well you truly know the person, but it's how much good and bad memories you two share together.
Someone who can "click" with me, is not easy to find, as I'm not someone who is born with the friendly blood. It's only FATE if I can click with one without much "masking" on the face. Fatefully yours. I treasure each and every one who has been through thin and thick with me, thou I may not voice it out. But in my heart, I feel really blessed and lucky. :)
I may not be the best someone you go shopping with, or the best someone you go clubbing with. But I know, when my friends need me during their down times, I will be there. I don't mind writing a song or two for you when you needed some encouragement. I m ok to be a clown to make you laugh during your down times. And I'm not someone to count to the nearest dollar and cent with my friends. But if you are one of those who diedie must count to every single cent with me, then I may do the same to you lar. I always believe that there is no equality or fair share between good friends. Sometimes you win a little, sometimes you lose a little. It's like that. That's what makes a relationship balanced.
I can be stubborn at times, or rudely show my impatience at times, but I won't hold any grudges lar. Sleep, wake up and its a brand new day! Noone is perfect. Everyone has their flaws, even your chosen partner.
Yes, friends come and go, some merely left footsteps, some walked the your journey with you. Some footsteps trails are longer, some are shorter, but every trails of footsteps have their stories to tell.
Some friends move on happy without you, some stay with you - no matter what. If it's their happier choice, I wish them love and happiness. Sometimes, feelings change. Relationships have a different turn in direction. Sometimes more suitable people come into your life and you drop your old friends along the way. I guess that is part & parcel of life which I have to learn to move on.
There is no "forever", as much as many people hope it could exist. Just be glad you were blessed with such a good friend once.
A song for all my lost friends who were once very very dear to me. :) It's a pity we can't be Best Friends Forever, like what we thought we could till end of time. I will definitely still smile at the good and silly, but fond memories that we have shared, even when I'm sharing them with my grand children. Now, it's time to let go, give my heart a little time to heal the pain, and bid goodbye to you. I wish life treats you good and bless you with all the happiness you've ever deserved.
Till then...
I wish you love.
I wish you bluebirds in the Spring, To give your heart a song to sing; And then a kiss, but more than this I wish you love. And in July, a lemonade, To cool you in some leafy glade; I wish you health and more than wealth, I wish you love.
My breaking heart and I agree That you and I could never be, So with my best, my very best, I set you free. I wish you shelter from the storm, A cozy fire to keep you warm; But most of all, when snowflakes fall, I wish you love.
Wednesday, 27 June 2012
37 weeks - near to the final lap.
Last night his daddy suddenly hugged me and said "I can't wait for Manfred to come out... Can we go Dr Ho there and ask him to induce?" LOL. Can you imagine MY FACE. >..< Hee.
I think I'm mentally ready. Anytime. I just pray for a "more convenient" signal from the boy. Manfred baby, give mummy a good signal ok?
I enjoyed all the trimesters thru out, hmm, but recently, when the aches all start kicking in, it's really a little tough for me. Not as agile. Can't walk with grace, like a swan. Not as energetic. Fatigue is the only word to describe my daily life, no matter where I am, or what I'm doing... I'm always tired nowadays. I can sleep-in until noon on weekends. But after washing up, I'm tired again, and there, I collapsed on the bed again, before I even could have a decent
Did I mention Manfred's wriggly kicks and punches more often nowadays, making me wriggle in my seat too? Sometimes he is trying to push his head out, can feel the heavy pressure down there. And I will ask him "Son, u sure u r ready??" And then he will think think about it, and stopped. Hee! Of coz, my stomach feels really bloated and heavy now. Pls, don't ask me to walk up any sloppy angles if you still wanna stay alive. hah!
Daddy was silently hoping that Manfred could pop on his birthday, 5th July. Hmm, I have no preference, so long as Manfred is healthy and ready!! His mummy is ready anytime from now. :D
We have packed the hospital bag, and have bought most of the stuff required. The only thing I may have a little regret, is that I should have maybe gotten a double pump. Heard from many mummies and read from forums that double pump really help to save A LOT of time and effort. But well, we shall see how... see if Daddy is sweeeeet enough lor... *Hint* Yap, the sum is Woohoo too!
Ok, share a silly thing I would do from now until Manfred is here. Every night, I straighten/blow nice nice my hair before I sleep. So just in case Manfred wanna pop in the middle of the night, I have nicer hair to deliver him. Ok... lame. BUT, it's for photo-taking purpose lar. No vain mummy would want to take picture with your new born with like hair sticking out from EVERYWHERE right??! So, it does makes sense actually. Teeheehee~ So I was thinking along the "Murphy's law" and maybe, just that ONE NIGHT when I'm too tired to kiap my hair straight before I sleep, Manfred will decide to say "Hello" that early, very early morning. And if he does that, the first thing i would do when he pops out, i will smack his butt gao gao to settle the 私人恩怨 i have with him first.
I've been drinking cooling stuff and coconut water nearly daily, hoping for a "cleaner" and easier delivery. And maybe "somemore" durians, hoping Manfred could grow bigger. Still, sashimi and beer are out of reach... even after Manfred pops, as I will (may) be breastfeeding him.
18 days to EDD! :D
Yes, I'm looking forward! Just nice, my jobs on hands at work are 99% completed. So yup, I won't be taking in new jobs already.
Yay! Until then... :)
Tuesday, 26 June 2012
U know you want to, but you can't...
Sometimes you just want to accept the person for who they are, but its just so... not easy. You would ask, what happened to the person I've married less than a year ago.
The crazy amount of weight I have gained, near 20kg, and the impossible-to-finish-counting stretch marks that happily leeched on my tummy, I know.. are just a bigbig turnoff and its also your huge worry if they will follow me for life. They may. Oh, and my cannot-find-my-neck bloated face too. (Scary eh.)
The aching in the bones, especially the pelvis bones, made me have to walk like some old Penguins, although I'm trying my best to walk like I'm on some runway... but Epic Fail - its clumsy and Not cute. (lol)
Im getting so clumsy now, ever since last Monday when my pelvis bone starts aching. I can't even wear my shorts properly (after bath) as my legs cannot be carried up higher than the knee level and the worst, my big tummy dis-enable me to bend forward. So I have to wear like this - Bend my upper body as low as I can, right hand holding the shorts freely hang in the air at about knee level, trying to "one-try" and fit my right leg into that hole, and then change hand, same level or lower, "one-try" and fit my other leg in. Sometimes it takes more than 2 tries. And sometimes I lost my balance and hopped a bit. All because of the pelvis aches.
So clumsy of me, that I don't even wished you would see it happening. That's why I would always locked the room door when Im changing and you are outside of the room. Then I would, comfortably, sit on the bed, and try to wear my pants/shorts taking my own sweet time. In the room, it's still ok, at least I can sit on the bed for more comfort. But in the bathroom - Argh, its another different story.
When I woke up from bed, I hate to let you see that side of me too. I totally have to limp to the toilet in the most awkward manner you cant imagine. And my finger bony joints are painful too, they cant hold tight to something, coz when I bend them together, ouch! My fingertips cant touch my palm. I have the infamous Buter Fingers now. And that was why I accidentally dropped you iPhone yesterday during breakfast. And u gave me that angry stare and asked me "What are you doing?" I knew, at that point of time, I dont have to explain much. I just kept quiet and ate my sandwich. Coz you wouldnt understand, and would just categorize my reason for an excuse.
I always hate letting people see the weak side of me. My smile and and loud laughters often cover it. And I hope you dont get to see them as well. But I cant hide what is obvious on my surface.
People said being pregnant is beautiful, I dont know where did that come from. haha. But nevertheless, my love for Manfred Baby stays. Jiayou Baby, in 19 days to come! We will PUSH together.
Sunday, 24 June 2012
It's a Blink-A-Blink Weekend!
Too fast.
Maybe becoz you're coming soon.
A few highlights - I found my coconuts! @ Kovan Hawker. Yes, those GREEN OLD COCONUTS! The water is not sweet - compared to those small thai ones. But its better for BB, becoz its cooling, and I m having ulcer. :(
And then Yujing finally got her new desktop from Sim lim! Woohoo! She is one very lucky girl, maybe that is the best part of being the single child.
For today, we had 126 Geylang Dim Sim for lunch, my favourite!!! Expensive but nice.
And guess what, after craving for Mao Shan Wang for the whole week, and Manfred's daddy is not willing to oblige to the request.... My dad bought 2 boxes without me complaining to him. WOOHOO! Father knows best. Its shiokmax! With the seeds, as slim as... 1/3 of a iPhone depth. Nice~~~ I wanted to only have 2 seeds, but ended up... erm .. *guilty look*
The BBQ for Michael Fong's farewell was really nice. :) Though the attention is on Manfred, most of the time. : ) Everyone is so excited about Manfred.
We are going to see manfred tmr at Doc Ho! And gonna listen to your heartbeat o!
You are a full term baby!
Saturday, 23 June 2012
I want to think like a child...
I hope to see things from another perspective. I m learning to trust and not to judge, to be honest, and kind.
I can be hurt by others, but I don't wan to pay back to others who hurt me. I just wanna move on after seeing someone's true colors.
While growing up, especially when started to work in the society, our minds grow faster and stronger, but it's more on how to take things to our advantage given that we are all working in a battlezone. Whoever wins, whoever survives.
Now that I have Manfred, I wan to clear my mind all over and start thinking anew.
Some things I can't do....
I cant bend forward to pick something from the floor, I do it by using my toes to kiap.
I can't massage my legs on my own le. And I feel freaking blessed when daddy do that for me. Though it wasn't like frequent everyday thing, I feel loved when he remembered.
Alright I'm freaking tired and cannot type properly le. Good night
Friday, 22 June 2012
My first own-made Facebook cover page
Im proud of myself. Not exactly the best I can come out with, but with the energy level vs fatigue level in me now, I think this is somewhere near very "zai" already. I love!
I am so proud of myself. Nice hor? :D:D
Oh, anyway I have got huge cravings for pizza and wings last night, and daddy brought us to Pizza Hut for a late dinner. So love him to bits! There was like 1-for-1 promotion, so it was really worth it, and Pizza Hut's service has definitely improved a big step, at least I feel so at the Kovan outlet.
My baby, U r coming out soon o, in less than a month. *Breathe in, Breathe out* So excited. But i havent seen the mucus plug yet leh. So maybe still not so soon.
I love you. I love you. I love you.
Wednesday, 20 June 2012
It's been 10 days!
u r manfred's champion dad!
For someone who has smoked for 15 years, it's really not easy to not touch, but once u r firm in quitting, noone can tempt u. Same thing, if u dun wan to quit, noone can help u.
It's fresh air every morning! I don't mind waking up early to prepare brekkie for him as a reward. But he's a fussy brekkie person. He doesn't like sandwich( the easiest to prepare ma). Even if he is OK with sandwich, it has to be egg mayo type. Or Ham cheese egg sandwich... those that need some time to prepare one. Not that I complaining, as long as he has a good brekkie.
My prata egg that I have been procastinating.. I will cook tmr!
Have been feeling really tired these two days. Pelvis bones starting to hurt. Didn't sleep well. A lot of things on mind. No breaktime for my busy brain. And maybe it's the light. Have been sleeping with bedside lamp on. Somehow I will feel more secured with the lighting.
Manfred is coming anytime. I m so excited and nervous. Ah!
Baby, I seriously am contradicting! I wanna see u so badly. But I'm gonna miss u badly too. Aiyo!
OK la, u stay inside until ur ready. And most preferably at 3.5kg OK?
I love u. Muacks!
Monday, 18 June 2012
Manfred is engaged.
Doc Ho pressed on my tummy and he said, its engaged. I was like "huh"? So fast?
But Manfred is not growing enough leh. Baby ah, u have to be at least 3.5kg when u pop out k? OK?
I'm starting to feel the dull ache in my pelvis bones.:( But on the bright side, it's ok. It means Manfred is ready. :) yay!
Anytime from now. I'm waiting to welcome my little precious.
Manfred, mummy loves u.
Sunday, 17 June 2012
My first Bak Kut Teh!
And it was a success! At least the ME with high expectations for myself think it's nice. I oredi planned to go downstairs and the BKT then replace with mine if it's screwed. But surprisingly, it smells heavenly.
My recipe:
everything can be found at Fairprice.
1. Pork prime ribs 2 packets (house brand)
2. SEAH spice premix
3. Garlic 8 mini clusters
4. Pepper
5. Salt and sugar
How to do:
1. I've actually marinated the pork ribs the night before. Wash clean then rub salt on them. Put it in zip lock bag, and fridge them.
2. OK, morning comes and I take out the ribs from the fridge. Wash again, remove excessive salt. Boil the ribs for 5 min to remove dirty stuff. Add sugar, help to tenderize the meat. Soft soft meat later!
3. Rinse the pork with cold water. Let cool.
4. Prepare the pot u need to boil the soup. Add A little bit of oil. Really like one teaspoon only as the pork will produce oil to your soup later. Chop one mini garlic and fry till fragrant. Add in the pork and fry a min.
5. Add about 1.5l of water. Add spice premix. Bring pot to boil.
6. Add the rest of the garlic in tact with the skin on. Of course, wash first.
7. OK, then on slow heat, simmer soup for an hour or so. You will smell the heavenly bkt in your whole house. That was how my bro in law woke up.
8. 5 min before u serve, add pepper to taste. Depends how spicy you want it.
Optional: u can add beancurd skin and taopo. Or some cabbage leaves. Look more fulfilling.
Tadah! you will one nice BKT waiting.
I'm so proud of myself. :)
Happy Fathers Day!
But its ok lar, daddy feel your presence anyway. Since its Father's Day, mummy is gonna write about my daddy, your gong gong.
You know baby, since young, i was brought up in an environment that my daddy was the "weakest" person in the family, he has no say in anything, coz the "power" goes to my mum. He was always behind my mum. My brothers said he has always been a coward, always behind my mum. And since young, I was brought up with the mentality, and so not much respect was given fairly to my dad.
Gradually when I grow up, and I started working, my thoughts become more mature, and due to external influences from friends, colleagues, and other factors, I learn to see things from another perspective, and that is how I change my view of my father only recently. In fact, I think he is the strongest man in the family, with the strongest mentality.
My father is not an educated person, but I can say he is a successful man. From nothing, nothing at all, he builds up his business with sharing from other partners, but later on failed, and he fights alone, and now he is still maintaining his business at 74 years old. From no knowledge at all, he is good at managing his investments - stocks and shares. That is where the money source comes from, for our above-average living standards at home.
With a degree education, I may not be able to earn what he had earned and invested in his life time.
Sometimes I wonder, why isn't he a wonder dad to his children? They always say mean things about him, but in actual fact, he had accomplished things that all of them are never capable of.
1. He pays for ALL our things and education. He never said things like "You want, you go work and get it yourself lor." He gave me my pocket allowance (when I was till schooling) on time, never missed a day. He even trusted me to give me and my 3rd brother a sub credit card. But of course, I have never betrayed his trust on that. I guess its a mutual trust and respect thing.
2. He loves my mum, beyond words can describe. If there is already no love, at least his responsibility as a husband stays very strong. My mother is horrendous when she throws her tantrums. She yells, shouts, threatens, fights, throw things, totally no respect for the husband. But ALL the times, my dad gives in. EVERY TIME. How many men can do that? Even now when my mum has slight dementia case and she forgets things and gets violent sometimes (when she has false illusions), my dad stays with her. He doesn't do things that my mum doesn't like. He stopped smoking. He stopped gambling. He doesn't have a life of his own. When he is not working, he is at home with mum. He always comes back after work then bring her for dinner, although 80% she will throw tantrums over dinner. He stays with her and "let her win" under all scenario. Seriously I dunno how many men can do that.
Men nowadays cant even stand a niam-ing wife, let allow a wife who forgets easily and tend to have false illusions then gets violent.
3. As a father, he has never given us any pressure at all. Ok, i dunno is that good or bad. Maybe his role as a father, to him, is to be able to buy us what we want. He is a man who had gone through quite a bit in life, and someone who has got alot to share to others. But he is gonna tell you his 福海大厦story... and a looooonnnnggggg one. haha!
4. He is always cheerful and positive. He is always smiley. Sometimes, i wonder how he does that. He is always happy to see us. He is always OK with whatever foods we want to bring him to. Mister OK is his nick.
I think, for the 4 bench marks above, not many men can be anywhere close.
My mother is lucky to have married a man who fulfilled his vow.
And, that's why I think my dad is super extraordinary.
Happy Fathers' Day.
29 days to go...
Wow... finally we are in our final month of being as ONE. I hope it was a pleasant journey for you and hope you had as much fun as I have had these 9 months.
Yup, 9 months already, but sometimes I still cant believe that I'm gonna be a mother. Every time when I walked pass a mirror or something that reflects my tummy, there is this "amazing" feeling inside me as I thought to myself, "my baby is inside".
As much as I wanna protect you and for as long as I could, you are gonna be independent in a few weeks to come. The moment will come when the both of us are gonna work really hard together and PUSH! I know I can only help you that much to PUSH, but u have to JIAYOU too. Hope daddy can be there to encourage us through.
Im getting really nervous. I dunno like how will you send me the signal. Will it be my water bag burst, or "the show", or stomach pain contractions??
Manfred bb, can you be so nice to hint me via "the show", instead of water bag burst? Or maybe starting with some mild contractions also can lar.
Today daddy and i have packed the hospital bag (Part 1). Mummy forgot to get the disposable panties, need to get them soon, like maybe tmrw. And while I was packing your stuff, I realised you would only have 3 sets of clothes to inter-change until u r 3 months old, then u would have more clothes. Aiyo, why mummy so blurrr! Ok, need to get more clothes for you, else you're really gonna wrap towel liao. Sugaraunt can sponsor your towels, she said. More sexy! haha! Anyway Im still contemplating whether to let you wear diapers or cloth diapers, then ask confinement auntie to wash. hehe!
Thinking back, my mentality has always been very traditional kind and follow the "old wives" way, until recently, I have a different view to things. You know they said during confinement, mummies not allowed to blow fan, bathe, wash hair, on air con.. blablabla. I used to be very confident that I can fulfill all.. but not now. Singapore's weather is SO HOT, how not to on aircon??? How not to bathe? Maybe ask confinement aunty to boil the herbal water for mummy to bathe and wash hair lor. And not on-ing aircon is NO-NO! Imagine you are gonna latch on mummy, and im all so sweaty. Eeeek!! So unhygienic for my baby! >,,< How can?
Actually still thinking if I wanna do confinement at 婆婆 place or 奶奶 place. Hmm... Not like both your grandmothers (maternal/paternal) will be very helpful, or to help in confinement.
These are my thoughts...
If I stay at 奶奶 place:
1. I dunno how clean or not clean is the confinement aunty, if she makes a mess out of the kitchen, your 奶奶 is not gonna be very pleased.
2. Im sure Im gonna on the aircon - 24/7. Yes, WHOLE DAY! or maybe at best, MOST of the day... I think your 奶奶 is gonna faint. I will fork out money to pay for the electricity bills, of course. But still.. you know...
3. I feel bad that ah zhuang shushu gotta let the confinement aunty sleep in his room, and he gotta sleep in the living room. So ke lian.
If I stay at 婆婆 place:
1. I can on air-con, confinement aunty can sleep in the extra bed room, noone has to sleep in the living room, and my mum is not very particular about a sparkling clean kitchen.
2. Your 二舅母 can drop by often to see see look look. Maybe cook some delicious confinement foods for me!
3. BUT, THERE IS ONLY ONE PROBLEM... AND THE PROBLEM IS WE DUNNO THE PROBLEM (yet)! because you know 婆婆 has a little bit of a dementia case, so we dunno when will she have false illusions and go "mad" again. Sigh! And this can be the biggest threat of all challenges. Imagine if that happens, we will have to pack our bags to leave, and return to 奶奶 place. Aiyo!
Very poor thing hor. Not like many new-mummies whereby their mummies (maternal side) will take care of their daughters during confinement. Your Mummy has to be very independent and learn quickly how to take care of you. When the confinement aunty leaves after one month, its only mummy and you at home. hah! U have to be a good boy ok? U know im not fabulous with kids, especially new born. I havent even carried one yet! You are so gonna be the FIRST new born that I carry. :P 有没有一点怕怕。Ok lar, give your mummy some trust. Hello, maternal instinct leh!
And yes, Im gonna discuss the above issue with your daddy and see his opinions.
Oh, by the way, Daddy has quit smoking for 6 days... going to be a WEEK soon! Yuppie, we are so proud of him. Really. Daddy, you r manfred's champion dad! Continue with your determination and willpower ok? The first thing when you see manfred, you are gonna kiss him and said "hi baby, i've quit smoking." Anyway, manfred has been taking in your second and third hand smoke for the past 8 months you know.
YOU OWE US COCONUTS. haha!
Yes, I've forgotten to drink COCONUT water, which i should have started during my 8th month! Ahhh!! Daddy, we wanna drink coconut water tmr. Those bigbig green color coconuts, not the thai small small ones ok?
Oh, on a side note, Im gonna cook Bah ku Teh tmrw, since daddy has craving for it after his bball session tmr.
P.S.. as I stopped here to feel bb manfred, he is so quiet in my tummy, ahh, must be sleeping already. But his two limbs were like stretched out position, can feel the 2 lumps on the sides of my tummy. So I slightly shake him up a little. He closed back his open limbs and continue to sleep, i suppose. SO CUTE NEH~~
Okie, shall write more again. Going to read bed time story for my boy, since his daddy is not around. :P
Good night.
Monday, 11 June 2012
Daddy said...
It's a little doubtful, coz it was an impulsive commitment during an argument.
But nevertheless, when he reached his 17th hours without tobacco, I was very very proud of him. I hope he can persevere, but on the other hand, when I see him feeling so bad and suffering from all these withdrawal symptoms, I had this urge to ask him to give up quitting. Worse comes worst, its Manfred and me suffering his second hand smoke only mah. No big deal.
But I know if he can get through this, he has reached another BIG achievement in life. It's a legend he can tell his children, brag to them next time.
Actually I dont have the 101% confidence he can make it, because I dont want to have disappointing results later on. But, no matter what, as long as he is still on the journey to QUIT, I will be understanding and be there to SUPPORT HIM throughout, come what may.
It's gonna be VERYVERYVERY tough for him these couple of days. I hope he can make it.
Tuesday, 22 May 2012
Cramps aka false contractions
Manfred, u have to be good boy ok.
Sunday, 20 May 2012
It's 32!
The Harmones are driving me up the wall. I get upset over the small things easily. And I dun get enough sleep. And I'm always tired. And I wake up in the middle of the nights due to terrible aches under my ribcage. I have very weird dreams, sometimes scary ones. My brain doesn't stop at night.
I worry bout things at work too. I realise I'm not that productive anymore. When I meet with tough choices, my mind is not as quick as last time, to manage the situation, sometimes I feel even causing stress to Manfred. And when I'm not around for the two months, I thought I could be easily replaced by others. And thinking bout it now, two months seem too short. Only have got 2 months of full attention with my son... then I will only be seeing him like few hours after work. I so wanna be a stay home mum now. I guess I will miss him like mad at work. And, still I'm not ready to perform well in my role of the head of team. :(
Sometimes the mental guilt crawls in when I have this love-hate relationship with my boy. Like, the stretchmarks, the sleepless nights when he is over active. Actually I dun mind him enjoying himself playing inside me but sometimes there are times when it's late and the fatigue comes in all together. And I can get a lil pissed off. Also, since his arrival into my tummy, I dont feel attractive anymore. The bump is there, I feel clumsy like hippo.
But Oh yes, I still love Manfred deep down, and I still love my hubby too, who is there for me, for a preggy wife. Just that the hormones now, especially in the third trimester, craves n whines for a more affectionate hubby more than ever, to kill the insecurities and all. but actually he is pretty up to standard already...
Two more months... thrilled n scared... Its another kinda life.
Sunday, 29 April 2012
The 7 months so far...
Luckily for me, my 1st trimester wasn't as bad as others have described, other than the fatigue that I've faced and the occasional blackouts in the train, at least I didn't have to hug the toilet bowl to sleep. My vomit times was less than 10 in the 1st trimester, unless I've eaten something that I didn't really feel like eating, then the Merlion show will proudly present itself. :)
Now that I thought back, I don't know what gut did I have, to travel to Europe when my baby was only so so young. The 14 hour flight, the Switzerland alpes with high altitudes, the super winter chill at (-) temperature and the French cuisine. Totally out of our minds to continue with our trip, although the gynae had authorized us to do so. The traumatized moment when I black out on one of the alps, I vomited like hell, sat on the toilet and prayed to God aloud, that my little baby be safe and strong. I was near to tears, I wanted my baby to be safe so so badly. Another frightful moment has got to be the awful weather when we were on the flight, and the plane was rocking, like a ship in the choppy waters! My stomach felt like it was in my mouth and I was holding on to the hubby's hand so tightly. Prayed really hard. It lasted for quite a while. :( As I spoke to my little one to calm him down, I was actually very worried to myself. After all, we reached home safely.
It was a beautiful trip, the hubby made milk for us every morning, just to ensure baby has all the nutrients he would need from the milk! I think that was the part I missed most, coz after we were back in SG, no more milk by him. Bah!
As we moved on, my belly gets bigger and bigger. When I was 4 months, my belly was showing already. Everyone close to me was so surprised, then they started comparing me with "those others" with smaller bellies. But i love my belly, meaning my baby is growing bigger. So long as my baby is healthy and growing, I don't really care much about other thing.
Second trimester was a breeze. Hmm.. I didn't have much of those late night craving, nor those non-sensical tantrums which preggy have privileges to. I was happy and hyper and still childish, in a way. And I don't want to lose that kiddy side of me.
And then we were deciding the names between Maximus and Manfred. Maximus came from the Dad, which means "The Greatest". I didn't wanted my son to be too arrogant, so I picked up Manfred. Manfred represents "Man of peace and Strength" and I really loved the meaning of that. Life has its ups and downs, and I hope my son can conquer them with his inner peace, and with the strength of his own or together with others. I'm quite on for this name, unless another name better comes along in these 2 months.
All was good until I had got stomach pain and was admitted during my last week of the 2nd trimester. When I was at KKH, the doctor said I was having contractions, but it wasn't ideal for me to give birth yet as Manfred was only 26 weeks. I was given the orange pills to stop the contractions and jabs on the thighs to develop Manfred's lungs faster, just in case he couldn't wait. The jab contains steroid, cool eh? Maybe next time Manfred can run 2.4km with no sweat. :P KKH had no more room for me, so I was transferred back to Mt Alvernia, where my gyane is. It was my ever first hospital stay. I thought my virgin stay would be when Manfred says hi to the world. The hubby was the greatest during that one week period. He rushed to visit us in the morning before he goes work and after work. I believe it was shag out for him. I am very proud of him, I'm sure Manfred is too!
Ending 2nd trimester, then I realized my SRETCHMARKS on the belly, on 2 sides, like trees growing taller and taller. I would love to think that Scretchmarks are the most beautiful scars for a woman, it marks her valuable hardship on bearing a little Life. But well, women being women on the vanity side... it could be very depressing. Thoughts like how would the Father of the kid think of those never ending lines on the belly, and stuff like that. I am trying to think of the positive side, thou.
Just stepped into my early 3rd trimester, 77 days to go before I will miss all the kicking, hiccuping, and boxing taking action in my belly everyday, especially when I am cosily in bed, he doesn't want to say good-night yet.
The first problem I face now, in the last trimester, must be the constipation! The sight of the blood in the toilet bowl is still haunting me now. I guess I need prune juice and Vitagen like immediate now. :(
Just now I tried on the toilet bowl again, never had I sweated so much while poop-ing. Painful and sweaty. And then i dare not push anymore, i stopped, with half of the business undone. It feels so uncomfortable! I am still thinking what am I going to do now...
77 days.. I hope Manfred will be safe and my constipation will be cured.
Thursday, 19 April 2012
At home nua-ed for 6 days
I hope we can get better soon and mummy can go back to work. :)
Actually i also dunno what is "better". Mummy is feeling fine, sometimes really good. Just that if I strain myself a little too hard, tummy will be a little painful. :( So we try not to push ourselves too hard, and not walk too long a distance.
Manfred's been really actively these 2 days. And mummy love it. I prefer you being active than quiet. It always gets me very worried when u r quiet, like 2 days ago. :( Nearly wanna rush to hospital liao, until daddy insisted that he felt movements.
Something's really cute happened today.
While I was on my lappy, suddenly u gave me a Knock! I asked you what is it, do u want milo or something. And if you want milo, give me another knock, and you REALLY KNOCK AT THE SAME PLACE!!! How can i not crawl down the bed and make hot milo for you? U tell me, my precious darling.
Mummy is so bored. Hopefully Daddy doesn't have to work late tonight. He is going away next week to Thailand. Manfred, you cannot be too excited ok, u have to wait for daddy to be around k? Mummy love u!
Thursday, 12 April 2012
Manfred must be strong like Daddy.
Tuesday, 10 April 2012
Mummy got hospitalized for the 1st time.
We have cmone with us too.
Daddy is very nice to stay thru whole of yday with us. And he came early this morning! so proud of him!
mummy has the most painful jabs in my life in my thigh and one behind my buttocks. For Manfred!
but I think it's mummy's fault. Mummy was too emo on Saturday night. And Sunday came the dull cramps. Then luckily daddy insisted bringing me to hospital yday. Happened that mummy has contractions.
Now, we are trying to stop the contractions before we can go back home. Mummy miss daddy so much last night. :(
Manfred u muz jiayou OK? Hang in there until July k? For your best sake OK? Mummy and daddy dun wan u to suffer if ur borned preterm. Hang in there!!!!
Monday, 9 April 2012
9 april.
Took a jab in the thigh to help with ur lung development. Just in case.
Took 4 courses of orange pill every 15min interval to help with the contractions.
A long long chart to display ur heartbeat and contractions. Mummy 读不是很懂。
We r gg to doc ho soon at 2pm. :)
Thursday, 5 April 2012
Manfred KICK hard on 1 APRIL :)
Lovin it. 3 more months. :DD Your movements are more obvious now. Even Daddy can see it from outside the tummy.
Daddy loves listening to you kick kick. Will be seeing you in 3 weeks time. Meanwhile, mummy will bear with the backaches :(
:D
Can't wait right?
Tuesday, 27 March 2012
Scattered brain mummy
My mind is like as if it's been left at home. I can't think properly. If it's with me, then it's confirmed jammed up like a photocopier machine.
But on a good note, mummy bday week celebration starts today! With God grand ma n family. :)
So smile!
Monday, 26 March 2012
Manfred kick here kick there...
I love u Man.
Anyway today mummy complaint to doc ho that I had cramping. He extracted some stuff from mummy from below. It's v uncomfortable. Still can bear with the pain, but just not comfortable.
I hope Manfred can bear with the discomfort too.
My Manfred is strong de, right?
Little Manfred, happy 24 weeks!
Next time we may have to visit doc ho ourselves. Daddy shows a very stressup face coz he is late for work le. Making mummy n Manfred stressed too.
Anyway mummy is so happy that my baby is 745gm! Hee, heavier than expected o! My previous darling, mummy or u, need dieting eh?
next visit will b another month on 23 April. ;)
Friday, 23 March 2012
We r dining with nai nai and da bo family
Let's see what will we be eating later. :)
Manfred wake up!
It's a veryveryvery HOTTT weather.... Therefore...
Muacks!! :D:D
But i feel u kick kick today. Mummy is happy de lor!
Anyway mummy will be conducting interviews on Monday. Very excited. :P Gan chiong, a little.
How was your sleep last night at Wai Po house? Mummy had a superb good one. Slept at 11pm!!!! ACHIEVEMENT! I hope daddy had a good one too. But I doubt so. Coz his mattress not that comfy. Mummy angry he lazy to take the thick one. He would have a better sleep. :(
Anyway we will be seeing you on Monday!! hehe!!!
Thursday, 22 March 2012
Daddy is gonna make a big jump in his career....
Daddy has always been a very ambitious guy, so this should be something v thrilling for him.
We may be neglected at times, because of his workload, but baby, we can't tie daddy down with us. That is v selfish. U still have mummy and I promise I will be there for Manfred.:)
Fetus Movements.
To Do in Month 7: | After week 28, you can expect to feel fetal activity every day. Set aside some quiet time twice a day to "count kicks," or any fetal movement. Ten movements of any kind in an hour or less is normal. If you haven't felt ten movements within an hour, have a snack or some fruit juice, lie down, and continue counting; if it takes more than two hours to reach ten, contact your practitioner. |
To Do in Month 8: | Continue counting kicks, but be aware that your baby now has a fairly regular cycle of sleep and wakefulness. Sometimes a lull in activity just means deep slumber (and soon you'll be very grateful for that ability to sleep soundly). You should be able to perk things up with a snack, which usually rouses the baby. (If you don't feel movement — ten within two hours, contact your practitioner right away.) |
To Do in Month 9: | It's crucial to note changes in activity; count fetal movements a few times a day, and report any sudden decreases to your practitioner. |