Baby m is 16 weeks. :)

Well, thou it wasn't a totally easy and very smooth sailing pregnancy journey till now, baby m is already 4 months old. 

Two weeks ago it started with spotting some brown-pinkish discharge. I went to doc Ho and he have me duphaston and I have to go back for hormones jab twice a week. :( 

On and off the brownish pink stains still exist. Yes it's keeping me worried especially after reading those posts online. But after all it's not within my control. So long I do my best to protect the little one, he has to do something for himself and for mummy daddy. I have faith in u baby m. 

Went to visit Chen Er Bo yday and he said that baby m is a very sensitive baby so I can't attend red and white events. Cannot let people touch my tummy too. 

Ha, little baby... 你还真是的噢。

A most dramatic weekend~~ Painful, may be a better word. DENTAL SCARE!

And yes i had this sudden sharp pain that came for a good 5 minute at 11plus on Thursday night while watching tv. Since it went away, I didnt give a damn about it... until... 3.30am, I woke up from the pain again! Horrible. It was so bad. It pained from the gum, to the ear to the back of the head. I nearly woke Mike up, but it went away, so I went back to sleep.

The next day, I was at home working when that pain came and it started to feel unbearable. I put on ice, I rinsed with salt water, I didnt help much. When Mike came back, he fetched me to Q&M Punggol Place. It was an ang moh dentist on duty and she said there is no other way to solve it except to EXTRACT MY WISDOM TOOTH. I had great second, third thoughts about it. I went to Hougang and seek 2nd opinions at Dental Wong (Ave 8). Nurses all asked me to consult my gynae first.

I went home, praying all would be good. But it turned out to be the most painful night in my life. At midnight, while bathing the pain hit me so bad, I was crying with tears flooding down my cheeks. Mike heard me crying and he came over to the room,  and off we went to SGH (believed to have 24 hour dental help - as of google) When we reached there, the nurse said she cant help because even if she were to call in the dentist officer to come, he can only stop my pain, but given my scenario, there is alot of pain killers that I couldnt take - only panadol. So I bear with my FREAKING PAIN and we drove around Serangoon and Hougang Area, hoping to find a 24 hour dental. But no luck!

Went home, the pain went down like maybe 10%, I grabbed an ice pack/towel, bumped it on my right cheek and I fell asleep. It was 3am.

Seriously, in Singapore, u can have all kinds of pain in the middle of the night, but NOT TOOTHACHE. NOONE CAN HELP U!

The next day, I went to Q&M Hougang Central to extract my tooth with Doc Keffe Lim (or i dunno how to spell his name). He sounds like a Malaysian. Nice guy, no airs, and could see he tried his best and tried to be assuring. As I cant take x-rays, he cant do surgery for me, only to pluck out the crown and to leave the root there. He said the bone will cover back nicely. 95% of the patients have no complaints. But, if I wanted it clean, I can choose to take it out (again) after I delivered.

I was on local anesthetics, it wasnt painful, but definitely could feel the pressure when he tried to PULL MY TEETH OFF. I know he tried his best. And i think Guan Yin Ma is watching over me. I prayed hard for baby m's safety as I soothed my tummy.

Din really feel the pain, but the itch was BAD after I woke up from my nap. It was madness itchy!!

I wanted to eat mash potato for dinner and so Mike brought us to compass point to eat KFC. He ordered 2 pc for me too. (-__-'") I tried lor. He tore into smaller pieces for me and I tried. And yes, I could finish one pc. haha. And my muscles are tired already. I finished the Medium whipped thou. :) Love it. After which when we wanted to shop for my havaianas, I felt faint already, like really tired and non-stop yawning. Gosh, was I worried and scared. It was really not a good feeling to feel faint.

And off we go back, but before that, he drove to POPEYEs to buy 2 large mash for me, in case I got hungry.

I was able to eat on the actual day this time round, compared to the first time I had my wisdom tooth extracted. But that was the WHOLE tooth, and this time round its only 1/2 the tooth, not sure if that made a difference.

And the itch hasn't stopped since i plucked my tooth on Saturday. Pls pray for me that it heals soon! Its torturous.

Thanks all.

5 regrets human have on their death bed about their life

a nurse has gathered these from patients' deathbeds.

let's see.

When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.

It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.

2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.
This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way,you win.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again. When you are on your deathbed, what  others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.

Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness

-CREDITS: --  See more at: http://www.karenstan.net/2013/11/11/nurse-reveals-top-5-regrets-people-make-deathbed/#sthash.8zso1yj3.dpuf

Pink?

Bio-logically speaking baby number two has a higher chance of being a blue. But a part of my inner peace and voice tells me it's a pink. 

Let's see in a month's time. Baby, don't be shy don't be shy. Show doc ho what color u r!!

Mummy loves u!!

抢花

It's driving me and mike insane. Now that I'm into the 2nd trimester, manfred has really been cranky ttm. Is totally not easy to turn him in for the night. He wakes up at weirdest hours in the middle of the night. He wakes up damn early too! We r totally sleep deprived to the max. 

I need some help here. 

I need to train manfred to be able to sleep on his own very soon. Else how am I gonna handle both in months to come? And manfred is damn cranky!! I hope this stops soonest. Else I'm really going crazy. Totally driving me out of my mind!!!! 

Hello number 2.

Hi baby!!!

So happy to have 'met' u again yday at the Oscar scan. U were really cooperative and soo soo cute. U were literally jumping up and down. Or I was thinking were u having hiccups? Anyway good job baby, well done for yday. So active and cooperative. Kor kor was more bo chup that time when we were doing the oscar scan. 

Korkor loves u too u know? He always kiss kiss u whenever mummy asked him to sayang didi/meimei. 

Have fun inside baby. 2 more trimesters to go!! 

SIgh. A twist in my career

Really been quite long again since i last updated.

SIGH. Been more downs than ups - mostly in the work area.

I know i need to just TAKE THAT FIRST STEP. But I dunno what's stopping me. Seriously. WHAT? Confirm there wont be bonus this year one.

i should have the savings to cover me.

And I wanna start something on my own.

I dont wanna work under anyone anymore. Not now. Maybe after next year Aug? I wanna be there for Manfred whenever he wants me to. I grew up in such environment, and I hope my children can enjoy such a privilege too. Its so stressful to even take a MC when Im sick. Boss has been really unhappy about me taking leave. He said he understands, coz Im a mother and sometimes I need to take off to take care of my boy's issues. But it doesnt seem so. Can see that he is really unhappy about it. Especially that one week of urgent week. Boss said Im not doing enough to bring in more sales. But looking at my team - it just makes me doubly no mood to being in new sales.  Not positive nor supportive. Just a lot of complains, a lot of questions. :(

I need to start something. But what is good?

I wanted to go into property, but all the insiders told me its really a bad time to enter. COV is dropping. Noone sells.

Then I wanna start an online shop. But what? Everything is so competitive. I need something really SPECIAL, and UNIQUE that cant be found just anywhere.

MOMO game card? To revive it?

I need an idea. Just an idea. To ignite things.

Someone just give me some ideas.